Sunday, July 1, 2012

eat low-carb, or punish yourself

That title was meant to be a bit tongue-in-cheek.  I have to announce this up front, or some doctorate-types would insist that i'm 1) lying; 2) ignorant; 3) unqualified to open my mouth in public; or 4) all the above.

Reading all the commentary (in TPJ-approved sites) on why the Kitavan diet isn't a high-carb diet in the "modern world's" sense, something occurred to me:  a truly high-carbohydrate diet is all about Biblical-style asceticism!  YES!  If you eat a high PERCENTAGE of your diet as carbs you have a few choices to make, to keep yourself from embodying the Deadly Sins of Gluttony and Sloth.

You can eat your huge percentage of carbohydrates in comparatively meagre quantity.  A very low CALORIE diet can afford to be high-carb!  And what do we call a very low calorie diet, kids?  STARVATION.  Saints used to be very fond of that; it shows that you value spirituality more than worldly hedonism -- and you get really kewl visions and stuff -- sometimes you get to hear God talk to you!

Instead of eating very little every day, you can also choose to eat as much as you want today, and nothing at all tomorrow -- it balances out the same way.  If you prefer to eat every day, you can also decide to eat for a very short time.  Fasting is a multi-disciplinary-approved means of self-denial.

OR ... you can eat enough to saturate your bodies with all those strengthening "energy foods" and work extra hard to make them go into the SPECIFIC tissues you want them in.  Punishing the body to chasten it was also very popular in the height of the monastic era (AKA the Dark Ages).  If you worked hard enough you could make your body forget it has all sorts of horrible urges like ... a LIBIDO!  Ewwwww....  Where's that Ben-Gay -- i mean HAIR SHIRT?

;-)  Thanks but no thanks.  Their self-righteousness is not for me!  The believers in Gluttony and Sloth (reincarnated as food reward) may think i'm damned because of my faith in the Golden Calf (BEEF, yes!), but i'm not afraid.  Even if they're right about my destination, their idea of hell has no terrors for me -- and the music there is said to be much better.

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